ARE YOU IN DEBT?
I am sure you have heard that most Americans are in debt. This finding is usually followed up with how you need to manage your money and techniques for you to do so. These techniques are extremely useful. Although, they do not take care of the sinking feeling I see many of my clients have who have debt. They feel like failures, like they waste time and money and have nothing to show for it.
Although strategies are helpful to get out of debt, they do not take care of the negative feelings that interfere with how they feel about themselves day in and day out. Therefore, the feelings can interfere with their ability to feel worthy.
Today, if you are in debt, and it bothers you, or you are in denial about it, I encourage you to ask yourself “what your debt paid for?”. Were you spending money of frivolous things? For example: things that you don’t need, that you don’t use, name brand stuff to keep up with the neighbors, clothes that still have their tags on them, several hundred dollar trips at Target? If this sounds like you, the tough reality is that debt is not the problem. The spending and reasons why you have the debt could be.
What are you filling yourself up with or avoiding? These are the reasons why debt occurs. If my client is an active alcoholic, and they are in debt, I would want to see what his/her behaviors are when they drink. Do they go to a bar? Do they like a particular wine? Do they eat a “nice” dinner while drinking? Do they like to shop at night after they drink? Do they blackout and don’t remember what they did until they wake up in the morning?. All these behaviors that sabotage who they truly are inside also interfere with their financial stability.
Are you in debt because you are creating who you always wanted to be? This is a different reason to be in debt. Not everyone has an investor or family member who can finance your endeavors. If you are a self-made person, you most likely needed to get some financial help of some kind. Not many people have the money up front to purchase a home, or start a business, etc. etc. Take some time in this moment to celebrate your accomplishments and everything the debt you are in helped you to achieve. Then trust that you will get out of debt if you continue to do the things that fill you up and not just wait for things to happen. It just takes time. This is not the same as spending money out of trying to heal wounds that will not get healed by spending money, even though it may feel similar.
Do you struggle with spending money? This is just as much of an issue as spending it. Same coin, different side.
Today, put money aside (figuratively) and just focus on you. That’s all you can do anything about anyway, so why not? :) You are doing the best you can with what you have and if you are reading this, you are in the top percent of people who want to delve a little deeper and be honest with yourself. If you struggle with spending, if you spend too much, if you feel bad about your accomplishments; these are all a result of what is occurring within you.
Some clients have an issue to pay for the help to get insight into why they don’t have the money, love, intimacy, joy, etc. in their lives. In the end, getting help for your negative emotions helps you to save money. There is more money spent by not knowing subconscious struggles, then there is on anything else. Wishing you a good rest of your week!